


I Don't Deserve This

by Tay (erentitanjaeger)



Category: Sonic the Hedgehog - All Media Types
Genre: Establish Relationship, M/M, Sonadow - Freeform, everyone's aged up so dont come at me, farm au, proposal fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-27
Updated: 2019-08-27
Packaged: 2020-09-27 15:10:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,990
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20409811
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/erentitanjaeger/pseuds/Tay
Summary: You look perfect tonight.





	I Don't Deserve This

**Author's Note:**

> Set in an AU where Shadow runs a farm and takes in strays cause he is actually incapable of saying no. 
> 
> I have a lot of AUs and no where to put them so here ya go. My first Sonic fanfic as well, so I hope you all like it!

“I don’t care what anyone says,” Knuckles announced, stepping up onto the back patio. Everyone turned to him, and all suddenly wished they hadn’t as they were met with a putrid and pungent smell. “I definitely had the worst chore today.”

The five of their scrunched up noses and held breaths were all the agreement he needed. Sonic gagged, hacking around the awful smell Knuckles had brought with him to their afternoon gathering. Rouge and Amy covered their muzzles, Tails burying his into his tail, while Silver, polite as ever, sat ram-rod straight in his chair, refusing to breathe altogether.

“Yup, buddy, couldn’t agree with you more,” Sonic said, attempting to fan the smell away from his face. “Now go accept your prize: a nice, hot, far-away-from-here-so-we-don’t-have-smell-you-anymore, shower!”

Like good sports, everyone applauded. Knuckles took a victory bow, briefly giving an acceptance speech before marching past them into the house. The group heaved sighs of clean air once he was gone.

“Sonic, weren’t you the one who was supposed to be moving the manure patch today?” Amy asked, leaning over to take a biscuit from the plate on the table. 

To this, Sonic only gave her a sly grin. His entire body relaxed into the couch cushions, smugness written on every inch of his long limbs. 

“Yes, but apparently Shadow wanted to keep my adorable self spick and span so ‘shovelled’ the task onto Knuckles.” Cue a collective grown from the group at Sonic’s terrible use of words. “I didn’t even have to ask!”

“Wow. Must be nice dating the boss,” Silver voiced, albeit, slightly irritably. 

Jibes aside, everyone knew that if Shadow had changed their assigned chores, even last minute, it would be for a good reason. Even if not, no one would argue. Their small, weird and estranged family had an unspoken agreement; never question Shadow. In many ways, it was all their own ways of saying thanks. Thanks for taking them in. Thanks for giving them rooms, food, well-paying and meaningful jobs. Thanks for caring for them. So when Shadow told a red echidna to move an entire patch of manure so his boyfriend didn’t have to, as unfair as it might seem, he just did it.

No questions asked.

Besides, every one of them knew there _ was _ a reason for this sudden shift in agenda, and it only had something slightly to do with Shadow playing favourites.

Every one of them knew besides Sonic.

“So, Ames, what’s on the menu tonight at _ chez-Amy? _” 

Amy was already collecting tea cups and stray biscuits. The sun going down meant it would be growing cold all too soon. It meant the end of the working day for the farm and its farmers. It meant a hot meal, warm company and a cosy bed before it all started over again tomorrow.

Before Amy could answer, there was a gruff voice behind them, signaling the arrival of one such Shadow.

“_ They _ will be eating roast beef and mashed potatoes. With added broccoli for Tails.” Sonic scoffed at Tails’ offended ‘hey!’, turning on the outdoor couch to see Shadow standing clad in a pair of worn jeans and a white shirt, leather jacket propped on his shoulders. “You and I, however, are going down to fix the back fence.”

Sonic’s delight at seeing his boyfriend return, only morphed into confusion. The sun had already started setting, even taking the truck meant they wouldn’t reach the back fence on time to finish repairing it before losing what little light they might have left. Furthermore, Shadow was as strict on his rules for them as he was in his ways, and not working once the sun touched the horizon was one such rule Sonic had been forced to live by since wandering onto the farm only a year ago.

“What?” Sonic asked, trying not to get defensive. “But it’s late! I’m sore! I’m hungry! Can’t we do it tomorrow?”

“No time,” Shadow stated, already threading his arms through his jacket and heading towards the dirt bikes. “The neighbours asked to use that paddock and I don’t want their cattle mingling with ours. I won’t be responsible for ruining their organic status.”

“Isn’t it dangerous to repair a fence when we won’t be able to see deadly wires flying at us if they snap?” Despite Sonic’s whining, he was already moving. He got up, shaking out his legs which had decided it was indeed the end of the day and Sonic would be hard pressed to wake them back up.

“So don’t snap them.”

“That was _ one time! _ I was still learning! You’re just a bad teacher!”

The gang waved them off, Shadow kicking the bike into action as Sonic climbed onto the back. Sonic saluted, unbeknownst to all their knowing smiles, clinging unnecessarily tight to his boyfriend’s back as they sped off over the farm.

It might not have been ideal, but all in all, alone time with Shadow was never something to take for granted. Since taking Rouge in earlier in the year, which meant moving Silver to the main house and now occupying the room next to theirs, alone time was few and far between. That being said, their family was no stranger to their prolonged moments of PDA, and even had a score board on the fridge to make a fun sport of seeing who could catch the two in the act the most. 

Embarrassingly, Tails had a solid lead.

Speeding over the farm, a blazing trail of dirt behind them, Sonic found himself relaxing against Shadow’s back, and wondered how it was possible to feel so secure in such a precarious situation. There was something about Shadow, from the day Sonic had met him, that had always screamed sanctuary. Shadow took in every lost soul who wandered off the beaten track and onto his property. Sonic had been no exception (though had come close). 

Shadow was strong, well-built from years building his farm to what it was, but it wasn’t his physique that had Sonic hugging himself between the quills on Shadow’s back. It was just as Shadow was. Having been tarnished and abandoned by the world himself, Sonic could never understand how Shadow hadn’t done the same. Despite his demeanour, first impressions (which had gone atrociously bad) and harsh attitude, Shadow had the biggest heart Sonic had ever seen.

Everyday Sonic was thankful Shadow had decided to share it with him.

“I thought Blaze was leasing your paddock next week?” Sonic asked, once the bike began to slow and he could speak over the rumbling engine. As suspected, it was already frighteningly dark. Only a sliver of red lay on the horizon, moulding into the navy of the night sky above. Sonic found he had to squint to see anything beyond a few metres ahead, yet wasn’t nervous even as Shadow didn’t turn on the bike’s headlight. 

“She is.”

Shadow didn’t choose to elaborate. Usually, Sonic would accept all this at face value, but despite having had the good luck of escaping manure duty, he really was sore and tired from his own chores.

“So, tell me again why we can’t do this tomorrow?”

“Because.”

Sonic felt he could hit Shadow if he weren’t the one single-handedly keeping them from crashing into a stray rabbit’s burrow.

Sonic was on the verge of accepting his boyfriend was just insane, let it be known, when something caught his eye. Pin pricks of light. Too big to be stars, too small to be industrial lights. They became clearer as they moved closer, and Sonic finally could recognise them as fairy lights.

Dozens of them. Wound over each and every crevice of the back fence, up the branches of the tree that offered it shade, trailing through the grass. A small table sat amongst it all, set for two with candlelight and an ice bucket holding what Sonic hoped to be a really good chardonnay. It was all in a haze of a warm glow, as fairy lights tend to lend when used as they were now. The tent set up to the side no exception, and as they finally slowed to a stop beside it all, Sonic could make out mounds of pillows and throws inside and...were those rose petals?

He wanted to make fun of Shadow. He really did, but the giant grin on his face betrayed his absolute delight.

“Okay, you giant slice of gorgonzola cheese,” Sonic began, taking Shadow’s offered hand to help him off the bike. “What did you do?”

Shadow’s own warm smile faltered, before the joke made itself known.

In that way, Sonic felt he wasn’t the only one who had learnt a thing or two since stepping onto this farm.

“You’re not as funny as you think you are,” Shadow said. Their hands held tight as Sonic was led to the table. 

“You’re right. I’m funnier.”

Now that he was closer, he could make out a picnic basket set aside, hopefully filled with a hot meal and maybe some dessert that Sonic was already planning to eat _ not _ off the plates, if that tent was to serve its intended purpose.

Before sitting however, Sonic grabbed Shadow’s jacket and brought their faces close together, planting a giant and sloppy kiss onto his boyfriend’s features. Shadow, anticipating the act of gratitude, met him half-way. It was a good kiss, as all of theirs were, the kind of kiss that bled from their lips into Sonic’s bones where he couldn’t suppress a full body shudder. When they separated, Sonic wouldn’t let Shadow move far.

“What’s the occasion?”

Shadow was silent, thoughtful, as he moved to sit down. Sonic followed his lead, but was attentive in the way Shadow was handling himself. There was an air of _ something _ about him that Sonic couldn’t quite place. He held a secret. Which may be the biggest surprise of the night as Sonic thought he knew all of Shadow’s secrets.

The classic sound of a champagne bottle popping echoed along the empty hills surrounding them, reminding them there was a world beyond this perfect bubble Shadow had so lovingly created.

“You don’t remember?” he asked, daintily filling Sonic’s glass, then moving to do his own. 

The question held no accusatory tone, only curiosity.

“Humour me,” Sonic answered, accepting the glass offered to him, and then the clinking of each of theirs in what was an apparent celebration. A warm paw held his over the table. Sonic gripped it tight, desperate to never let go.

“One year ago today, this fence was broken,” Shadow began.

“Yes, as it isn’t now, I’ve noticed. But I’ll let you buy me dinner late for lying to me.”

Shadow chuckled, and Sonic leant across the table to get closer to the sound. 

“One year ago today, I made you come with me to fix it.” Actually, it had been Amy who had forced them to work together on that particular project, but Sonic felt it only right to let Shadow keep talking. “You had no idea what you were doing. It infuriated me. I asked you to pass me pliers and you handed me a hammer.”

Sonic let out his own breathless laugh at the returning memory.

“In my defence, I thought ‘pliers’ was the name for the back end of the hammer.”

“No, Sonic, that’s still just a hammer.”

They both laughed, Sonic only finding good fun in how innocent he had been upon his first weeks here. Shadow had every right to make fun of him for it, as did everyone else...which they did at every chance they got.

They locked eyes, Shadow’s red irises burning under the glow of the fairy lights, the candle flickering between them. His expression was only soft, loving, kind. It held no judgement for the hedgehog Sonic once was, only love for the one he was now. Sonic squeezed Shadow’s hand, hoping he was conveying as much of his own love as he could in the gesture.

“One year ago today, I started sort of liking you.”

Sonic was fighting back tears, happiness he had never felt before embedded in his core.

Who knew someone named after a void of light, a place that could not be touched by physical beings and held only dark reminders of what they were not and could never be, only shone the brightest, and strived to share this with others. A characteristic Sonic never thought he would see in anyone, let alone someone who was guarded as Shadow. 

“Aw, babe. You had a crush on me.”

He managed to duck in time before Shadow’s punch could knock him off his seat. They were both laughing though, almost in hysterics, the memory of that day now so vivid in their minds. For Shadow, it marked the day he had begun to learn that maybe that big, city boy wasn’t a total waste of space after all. For Sonic, it had begun a course of family and acceptance once never offered to him, and one he never thought he’d seek, until Shadow had showed him what he was capable of.

They continued to share in the memory fondly while Shadow split the food. Chilli dogs, as Sonic should have guessed, yet made with the freshest ingredients. They laughed more, drunk often, or as much as they could each only using one hand. They refused to let go, the mood of the night having quickly set around them, to which Sonic wished to never leave.

He was sure Shadow shared the sentiment.

When their plates were clean, the wine bottle almost empty, and the fairy lights becoming more of a blob in Sonic’s vision then individual orbs, Shadow offered something so uncharacteristic of him Sonic thought he had slipped into a food coma and had begun hallucinating.

“You want to dance? Seriously?” Sonic was high on love and on life, so had no room in his heart to say no to the tender request. He took Shadow’s hand, following him a little ways from the table where Shadow’s arm was draped around his waist and their torsos were pressed close. Sonic could feel the coarseness of Shadow’s leather jacket under his own flannel. Felt Shadow’s warm breath on his cheeks. “There’s no music!”

Shadow only brought them closer, and Sonic didn’t hesitate to presses his face into the crook of Shadow’s neck, while Shadow began to gently rock them side to side. 

At first, that was it. The crickets chirping the only instrument playing, and honestly the only one Sonic thought they might need.

Until Shadow began to sing.

This wasn’t a surprise. Sonic knew Shadow could sing. His deep and melodic voice could carry a tune like no other. He rarely sang in public, moreso in the shower where he thought no one was listening. Yet now, his voice rang deep in Sonic’s heart as Shadow sung into his ear, a tune of finding love against all odds, coming home to the one you’re meant to be with. It had Sonic’s heart aching, trapped in the notes Shadow sung for him as he was swayed to the beat. 

They only parted long enough for Shadow to lead them in an elaborate dance Sonic hadn’t known Shadow could do. He was twirled and dipped, legs moving in synchronisation to Shadow’s own movements. All the while, Shadow continued to sing. The empty world around them providing surprisingly good acoustics to Shadow’s deep and baritone voice.

Sonic wanted to kiss him, yet didn’t want to interrupt as Shadow drew him in closer, pressing their foreheads together and delicately whispering the last notes as the night breeze carried them away. The song had ended, even the crickets and owls and had stopped to listen, yet it felt anything but silent between them as Sonic gazed into his lover’s eyes.

“I love you.”

Who said it first was irrelevant, only that there had never been a more perfect time between two lovers to utter them.

For as fast as Sonic was, it was a miracle he never saw what happened next coming. The surprise on his features genuine as Shadow gripped Sonic’s hands and bent to one knee. Honestly, Sonic blacked out during the next words Shadow spoke.

“Do you even need to ask?” Sonic’s voice was thick with tears he hadn’t known he had been shedding.

“Kind of,” Shadow said, eyes wavering but voice as sure as every action was that led to this. “That’s the point.”

Though Sonic had always wondered what he’d do if this moment ever happened, now that it was here, he was unsure what to do with his body. His words failed him. His body froze, and although he had been certain before, he now uttered an answer he hadn’t known he was prepared for.

\---

Breakfast was normally a free for all. At most, it meant hurriedly fried eggs on half-toasted toast. At the very least, it meant whatever cereal they had lying around the house. This morning, however, Amy had opted to allow them the morning off so they could enjoy the buffet she had so lovingly prepared. Everyone took a plate, moving it to the back patio where they set the table, filled jugs with orange juice and serving trays with bacon, pancakes, eggs and sausages.

“How do you think it went?” Tails asked, almost nervous. 

“Are you kidding? I half expect never to see them again the thanks Sonic is going to give him,” Rouge interjected, attempting a comforting smile at least on Tails’ behalf.

“Rouge is right,” Amy said, sipping her tea. “Those two are perfect for each other.”

It was silent as they all contemplated this. No one wanted to speak of the unlikely, yet very real, possibility of Sonic having said no.

The silence continued, except for the occasional chewing, until a rumble was heard in the distance. All turned, a pinprick of a shadow on the horizon and a trail of dust ever growing larger alerted them to the two’s return. At first, everyone remained where they were, unsure whether to greet them in delight, or be wary of their assumed depression.

The bike came to a halt just short of the house. Neither hedgehog seemed to be sharing any kind of fond sentiment beside casual looks and accidental touches as they climbed from its back and headed toward the group.

“I don’t see a necklace,” Tails voiced what they were all thinking.

Sonic was wearing Shadow’s jacket though, zipped up to his chin, his shoulders hunched against the still present coolness in the air. All tried not to appear worried as they drew closer.

“Hey boys,” Rouge waved. “How was it?”

Both appeared to be casual in their stances, but neither did they seem to share any joy. 

“It was fine,” Sonic said. “Good food, good company! A perfect date.”

He said this so nonchalantly, as if Shadow had simply driven them into town for a movie and spent the night at the local pub. A casual dinner between them, though nothing of note to report. The group all took turns giving Shadow a look, trying not to look as worried as they all felt. 

“Great!” Amy broke the silence, opting for acting overly enthusiastic at this development. “I mean, that’s all you can really ask of a date. Nothing else happening. Nothing good or bad. Nothing to mention! Right, guys?” 

The murmuring everyone gave in return was anything but natural.

Rouge fixed her friend with a look, to which Shadow only shrugged.

“Well, if nothing interesting happened, let’s carry on as normal!” Rouge pushed. As if snapping out of a communal trance, everyone turned back to the food. Muttering about chores for the day and duties to be done.

It seemed it would continue like that, they all having to live in perpetual fear of the apparent bad news now looming over their friends and their relationship.

“Oh,” Sonic suddenly piped up, grabbing everyone’s attention. “One kind of interesting thing happened.”

The silence was deafening.

Sonic felt he had played with them all for long enough, unzipping the jacket and dragging out the bright, green pendant he had been gifted.

“Ya boys’ engaged!”

The roar of commotion was instantaneous as they all leapt from their chairs. Shadow, finally free to drop the facade, looped his arm around Sonic’s waist. There were cries of congratulations, tears of joy shed. Hands shaken, quills ruffled. Knuckles almost broke Shadow’s back in a congratulatory hug. 

“Sonic The Hedgehog, I swear! If you ever scare me like that again!”

Sonic patted Amy’s back as she sobbed into his shirt, weakly punching him in the chest. Sonic giggled, sharing a knowing look with Shadow. The commotion only died once Shadow told it too. He made them all sit back down, grabbing a giant stack of pancakes as he went, moving to smother them in maple syrup. Sonic sat beside him, laughing at all their banter, no guilt felt in his trickery.

“I know ya’ll mad but you really should’ve seen the looks on your faces.”

No one was allowed to question Shadow, but it didn’t stop them from hurling stray chunks of toast at their beloved boss.

\---

“Do you even need to ask?” Sonic’s voice was thick with tears he hadn’t known he had been shedding.

“Kind of,” Shadow said, eyes wavering but voice as sure as every action was that led to this. “That’s the point.”

Though Sonic had always wondered what he’d do if this moment ever happened, now that it was here, he was unsure what to do with his body. His words failed him. His body froze, and although he had been so sure, he now uttered an answer he hadn’t known he was prepared for.

Sonic laughed. He couldn’t help it, but after giving an enthusiastic nod, his speech escaping him, he was wrapped in the arms of his lover where he was finally promised never to leave. The kiss was deep, tongues grazing as Sonic pulled Shadow tight to his body and breathed heavily through his nose as to keep pressed to his now fiance for as long as the earth would let them be.

“Sorry it’s not a ring,” Shadow’s words were entirely genuine as the pendant was placed securely around Sonic’s neck. The stone was a vivid green, long and warped, having not been artificially cut, attached to a string of leather with a crudely wound silver wire wrapped around its shape. It wasn’t entirely Sonic’s style, slightly contrasting with the sleek and modern style he’d always been known to carry, yet it was entirely _ Shadow. _For that reason Sonic would never object to wearing it around his neck for as long as he lived.

“Don’t be sorry,” Sonic whispered, lips pressed to Shadow’s in a searing kiss. Arms wound tight under black spines. Body heat shared. Tongues grazing, slow and sensual. “It’s perfect.”

They stayed like that, the night continuing on around them. The stars above shining brighter than ever, as if blessing the found love of two unlikely lovers. Sonic’s mind was racing behind his shut eyes, still slightly tipsy from the wine but swimming with affection for the dark hedgehog attached to his face. Something else creeped along his veins, under his fur, filling him with a jitteriness. Restlessness. Both recognised it all too well, and now newly engaged, out in the country with no one around for miles, a warm tent filled with comfort beckoning to them. There wasn’t a question as to what to do next.

“You do understand you’re getting _ so _ laid tonight, right?” Sonic’s voice was filled with playful mirth, and his grin only grew as Shadow was already walking them backwards toward the tent.

“Yes, that’s the only reason I spent weeks planning this and all day setting it up.”

Sonic laughed, unadulterated in this joy he was to share with Shadow forever.


End file.
